My PENIS

Devilschild

CES Staff
i hate my penis it never gets me laid...and it just hangs there thinking like haha im torturing Joe bc i never gethim laid and i just sit here and dangle around and get all sweaty and shit....bah bah bah iwill chop it off it it keeps it up!
 
Joe actually I recommend teaching your penis a lesson by showing it to a cat in the bathroom or something. Have your penis do some dangling and make sure the cat is in a playful mood.

Yeah, your penis will learn a lesson it will never forget.
 
It is one of those rare times when I agree with Claw Snuff. I think you should set it on fire if it sucks so much (or for the lack of sucking it receives in this case). There are many common household items you could probably use. I'm sure pegasus or Clammadical could help you out. If you are in bad need of matches, try grabbing some from some restaurant or institution which has free matches at the counter. You could always borrow some hobo fire.
 
Ask Santa Claus to do something about your penis. As long as you still believe in him, just like your cards, he will come through for you.
 
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